Brimbank Labor's oldest platform
News that former City of Brimbank mayor Charlie Apap has been convicted for indecent assault puts the spotlight once again on some of the more unsavoury history of the ALP in Melbourne's western suburbs, as a number of press reports show.
Labor Party identity Apap, 70 is known locally as a rent collector. He was found guilty in the Sunshine magistrate's court of putting his hand down the back of a 20 year old mother's jeans and underwear while collecting her rent.
Adding insult to injury, as the Leader reports "The landlord made a subsequent application for lost rent money due to the tenant giving insufficient notice before vacating the premises".
Apap is no stranger to the court, having previously been involved in a dispute over unpaid printing bills for Labor candidates at a Brimbank council election. At the last election five councillors did not declare any contributions to their electoral campaigns.
One of the councillors, Ken Capar, subsequently got into hot water at a New Zealand conference while on a council-funded junket for the Keilor Cemetery Trust. According to reports Capar remained drunk for the full three days of the conference, and was unfortunate enough on his return to wake up and see the headline "I was drunk" plastered on the front pages.
According to the local Star newspaper two women reported alleged sexual advances by Cr Capar. The story continues
"Cr Capar admitted being intoxicated on Thursday 10 October during the last day of the conference but in a letter to the Keilor Cemetery Trust he objected to allegations which included making inappropriate sexual advances to female and male delegates."
To cap it off hotel security staff later found him in possession of certain items that had been reported missing by other delegates.
Sexual harassment and theft by a councillor would not normally be rewarded. Capar resigned from the Cemetery Trust in disgrace but remains a sitting Brimbank councillor, no doubt grateful for the complexities of trans-Tasman litigation.
Chairwoman of the Trust at the time was Brimbank's Deputy Mayor Kathryn Eriksson, forced to endure the full three days of Capar's ratepayer-funded extravagance. With talk of police charges however she defended her colleague and in doing so submitted herself to public humiliation, saying
"It's a disgrace that we (the trust and council) can't communicate between ourselves. To have people turn around and say that we're going on junkets just because of one person behaved inappropriately, I find it really sad."
Indeed it is. Even more sadly Deputy Mayor Eriksson is also known as the wife of former Labor Minister Andrew Theophanous who became the first sitting member of parliament to be gaoled for bribery, conspiracy to defraud the Commonwealth and corruption.
Evidence submitted at his trial alleged that in rorting the immigration system he wasn't just seeking money, but also sexual gratification. An NCA tape recording has him saying "Maybe next week or towards the end of the week we might have a meeting, you know, see if I like her."
Channel 9's Sunday program quotes Theophanous from the secret recordings soliciting sexual favours. "…and she is prepared to have some times with me but keep her mouth shut completely then we will do it for $100 for a year." [A discount from the standard illegal fee he was asking for from clients].
Theophanous is still seen at Brimbank Council meetings, where he occasionally bumps into his close factional ally Hakki Suleyman. Suleyman is father of Brimbank councillor Natalie Suleyman; he runs the local migrant resource centre and in his spare time works as electoral officer for Planning Minister Justin Madden.
Suleyman was the subject of a formal complaint to the council in 2005, describing his behaviour toward a woman at a council meeting as "angry, rude, confrontational and abusive" to the point where she had to ask the CEO for protection and to be escorted to her car.
A number of metropolitan papers report an alleged assault by Suleyman on a woman handing out leaflets in the street. According to the Age
"He was pulling me and I was shaking back and forth at the force. I just saw his face and I thought, 'He's going to hit me'. I then started to panic and I screamed at the top of my voice, 'You leave me alone.' And he backed off."
The Herald Sun report of the incident mentions welts and cuts left by Suleyman on the victim's arm while "A day later, his son Mehmet Suleyman, who worked for former police minister Andre Haermeyer, allegedly attacked a young man with a screwdriver -- an incident police are now investigating." The report also mentions a fist fight between the younger Suleyman and Brimbank councillor Sam Tabban, but that's another story. Stay tuned for that one.
The press reports taken together paint the ALP in the west as a party of misfits and sexual predators using intimidation in the exercise of their power: the power of the rent collector over the young tenant, the power of the drunken councillor, the power to grant or deny a visa, and the power of sheer physical force.
Suleyman daughter Natalie shares with Charlie Apap the dubious distinction of being a former mayor of Brimbank council. Along with her current duties as councillor, she works as electoral officer for the now-discredited former Police Minister and MP Andre Haermeyer. For a time she worked alongside convicted criminal Craig Otte in the same office.
Haermeyer came to prominence again more recently when the Herald Sun reported police sources alleging he tried to influence the outcome of a rape investigation by using his influence over "top cop" Noel Ashby.
Ashby for his part said it was appropriate to keep Mr Haermeyer "informed" because Mr Haermeyer had a professional relationship with the woman. Perhaps you can work that one out.
The story makes allegations about the role of the Victorian ombudsman in the case and concludes by stating the obvious - there is no crime and corruption commission in Victoria capable of investigating the misdeeds of our elected representatives.
And don't they know it.
Greetings comrades. That is the trouble with the western press they would have you believe that I am some soul less moron comrade who hasn't got a sense of humour - that I'll as you say would need a skinful of vodka to tell a hilarious story. It is the new democratic way to accept criticism -Ioseb Besarionis dze Jughashvili - Joseph Stalin to non-comrades loved criticism. An interesting aspect of this story is that at the Yalta summit in 1945 with Winston Churchill, Franklin Roosevelt and Joseph Stalin were meeting. Roosevelt used to say 'Hey Joe' and Joe would say 'what me comrade?' Gorby told me that one and he told me Jimi Hendrix took up in his Voodoo Child album. Lying bastard. I digress - Joseph's good comrade lackey Pavel Khulaevich Beria once asked Joe whether he collected stories against himself as he believed it enriched the soul. 'I certainly do,' said Joe - how many ?' asked Beria 'you have many?' 'The Gulags offer such a rich variety I've lost count!' said Joe. I've always liked that one. When I was a member of the KGB - those were the days we had our own separate joke department and when the politburo decreed that there should be more humour to break the ice. Somehow it all got a bit mixed up and when an icebreaker (ледокол) was called for Brezhnev was told he had to go to Vladivostok because that's where they are - 'I have to go from Moscow to bloody Vladivostok for a joke?' Instead of 500 jokes they had built 500 f...ing icebreaker ships - 'What do you think we're going do with them - instead of exporting Marxist revolution we'll be exporting ice cubes?' All the comrades laughed but there was an uncertainty about who would be a comrade in the morning. I'm glad borderline gave me this opportunity to tell the joke of the month because it gives me the opportunity to express myself not as a man of iron but as a man of irony. In Russia we love irony but you don't get much irony anymore. Not since they pulled the Berlin Wall down anyhow - the bastards. That's not to say I harbour socialist thoughts - no way! I believe in democratic irony but I still get sentimental about the old days of soviet irony because I suppose it was more ironical. Let's face it as I was telling the Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev where has all the irony gone? He said would you like me to draw up a decree… the halfwit. I told him that was ironical and he said 'do I get a medal' and I said that's ironical. It went on for hours until about four in the morning I said 'I have to go to bed,' and Medvedev said 'that's not very ironical!' Even then when I tried to get to sleep I was counting sheep but I would get up to about eighty and there was Medvedev dressed up as a shepherd telling an ironical joke to a wolf who then laughed and started to eat the sheep, one, two, three, four…. I started to count the sheep the wolf was eating. When I woke up in a cold sweat my darling wife said I must have had a bad dream. I said I hadn't had a bad dream because I hadn't been to sleep. Then she said that she couldn't sleep either and maybe we could count sheep together. We got up to a couple of thousand before I had to get up because I had a meeting at eight. That's the trouble about being ironical it can lead, I believe to insomnia and eventual insanity. Still I am very pleased to present this months joke. I believe it is a good example of Soviet irony when Russia could really kick arse.
It was a great victory for Soviet diplomacy at the Helsinki conference.
President Ford, Giscard d' Estaing, Harold Wilson and Brezhnev assembled for a conference. After days of conferring they decided to take a break - they would go to India to hunt elephants.
Well, they did, and the very first day, towards nightfall, they caught an elephant. Now, what were they to do with it? They decided to tie it to a tree and agreed to take turns in guarding it.
The first on guard was President Ford. He stood guard for two hours, woke Giscard, then went to sleep. Giscard stood guard for two hours, woke Wilson, then went to sleep. Wilson stood guard for two hours, woke Brezhnev, then went to sleep. Brezhnev went to sleep too.
In the morning they woke up and there was no elephant.
'Where's the elephant?' they ask Brezhnev.
'What elephant?'
'What do you mean "What elephant"?' The others are indignant. 'Did we come to India to hunt elephants?'
'We did.'
'Did we catch an elephant?'
'We did.'
'Did we tie it to a tree?'
'We did.'
'Did we agree to take turns guarding it?'
'We did.'
'Did Ford stand guard?'
'He did.'
'Did he hand the elephant over to Giscard?'
'He did.'
'Did Giscard stand guard?'
'He did.'
'Did he hand the elephant over to Wilson?'
'He did.'
'Did Wilson stand guard?'
'He did.'
'Did he hand the elephant over to you?'
'He did.'
'Then, where is the elephant?'
'What elephant?'
